It’s time for me to talk about something that’s really important to me: Education. A very common prejudice in Sweden is that “all Americans are stupid” – seriously swedes, what an uneducated thing to say. Yes, the current leadership of the US isn’t helping the case in point, however, it is still not true. So why do a lot of people express this false generalisation?

Have in mind I’m just speculating, but I think it might have to do with the fact that the US is very extreme in many ways. There are almost 330 million people here, of course there are going to be a couple of different types of people. And which people do we hear about in the press? The crazy and uneducated ones. No wonder people outside of the US think all Americans are one single way, when that’s how media sometimes portrays it.

So, let’s get back to education. If you google “top universities in the world” almost every website has an American University at the top. Harvard, MIT, Yale, CalTec etc etc. From this we understand that the US offers top education, just like Europe. So in this way, they are extreme. But in a good way, according to me. Furthermore, the US ranks nr.125 in literacy rate, with 86.0%, while Sweden ranks nr.46 with 99.0%.* Even though it’s not too bad for a country with 330 million people, it’s still not in the top.

Another aspect of education in the two countries is the cost. In the US, you have to pay for tuition = pay to go to school there. It is a lot of money and many people have student loans for a very long time. In Sweden, tuition is free, or payed for by the government I should say. This means you only have to pay for books and housing. You actually get an allowance from the state every month that you study. Yes, free money. This sounds pretty weird I’ll admit. Anyway, it’s easy to think that the cost of tuition would prevent people in the US from wanting to get a higher education, but this doesn’t seem to be the case. Paying for tuition is just something that you have to do in the US, or at least that’s the general mindset that I’ve noticed.

Since I haven’t gone to college yet, that’s everything I feel I can write about now regarding University & Education in Sweden vs the US. Hopefully I can get back to it later with a little more experience.

-K

*https://www.worldatlas.com/articles/the-highest-literacy-rates-in-the-world.html

Yes, you read that correctly – today I’m talking about dating. Before you get too excited, I want to say that the post will talk about general dating rules and expectations based on what I’ve seen and heard, not on my personal life. (Yes, I understand that’s disappointing, but what can you do… (; ) Also, I’d like to include the book “The social guidebook to Sweden” by Julien S. Bourrelle*, simply because it is an amazing book that captures the social rules of Sweden.

Let’s start by talking about the American dating process. In my opinion, it is a little simpler than the Swedish one. So, Americans tend to be quite talkative, so saying hi to new people isn’t a problem. (Hear that Swedes?) Therefore, it is easy to stumble upon someone you like. At this stage, you ask them out on a date. Again, generalising, doesn’t have to be this way, to be honest it might be changing a bit, getting more casual perhaps. Anyway, the date is usually a dinner or maybe coffee. If that goes well, you meet for another date. Etc etc until it works or not. Of course people move along quicker or slower. This is basically what Bourelle describes in the book:

Now, how does dating in Sweden work? In the book, Bourelle describes the process like this:

1-It usually starts at a club/party together with alcohol (Swedes are known to magically become open people while having alcohol in their system). The Swede dares to say hello.

2-Then the process fast forwards…

3-If you wake up the next morning and the person is still there, you invite them on a date

4-If that works well, you go back to nr.2

5-If it’s still working, and only then, can you say hi to them in the hallway

6-Then you invite them to a second date

7-Then for dinner

Bourelle says that dinners in Sweden are a result of an established relationship, not a way to get to know people. Now, do I agree that this is the usual dating process in Sweden? No. However, I know that process does exist, and I believe it applies more to people older than I am, and not to teenagers/early 20s. Just a guess of course. So, how would I describe Swedish dating? I say it depends a lot on the individual. Since I am half American, I feel I can appreciate parts of the American dating culture. Maybe ask someone out on a formal date or so. This is in my experience not very common in Sweden among people my age. You don’t go on formal dates. You might go for “fika”** but you wouldn’t call it a date. The process is basically that somehow you stumble upon someone you like. You start talking to them, usually mostly via social media to avoid awkward in-real-life conversations. Then you go for “fika” and continue to hang out a couple of times. Then you jump to step 2 above. And finally, after that, can you consider calling yourselves a couple.

Another important difference in the dating process in Sweden vs the US, is the different expectations of the genders during the dating process. In my experience, the US tends to be a little conservative. If the two people dating are a guy and a girl (sorry my examples are all based on straight couples), the guy is expected to ask out the girl on dates. Not the other way around. He is also expected to pay for the coffee/dinners. In Swedes, where it tends to be more progressive, these expectations usually aren’t there. It doesn’t matter who asks who about spending time together. The most important part is to show your interest. When it comes to paying, some guys want to pay, some people just pay for their own coffee/meal. Some girls will even get offended if the guy wants to pay, since this is sometimes considered as gender inequality. In my experience, a lot of Swedish girls value gender equality very highly, and don’t want to seem “weak” by letting the guy pay. Again, it all depends on the individual, some appreciate traditional/conservative dating rules, some want to mark the newer progressive equal way of thinking.

-K

*https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/30325882-the-social-guidebook-to-sweden

**https://swedesour.home.blog/2019/03/30/fikafun/

Guess what day it is today? It’s Sweden’s National Day! If you see any blue and yellow flags you know why! So, what better to write about than the celebration of national days in Sweden vs the USA. To kick this off, I would like to say that Sweden and the US are quite different in this area. They both celebrate their national days, but the level of celebration is much higher in the US, than in Sweden. Here’s why:

As I wrote in my previous post (I know it has been a week, sorry people), Swedish social conduct does not encourage you to be proud, or at least not to talk about it openly.* When it comes to nationalism in Europe, the same thing goes. The thing is, nationalism** in the past has proven to be a bit complicated in Europe, you know, it may or may not have lead to a couple of wars… So, now a days, Most Europeans tend to be a little more careful about waving their flags or bragging openly about how great their country is. There are some exceptions of course, Sweden’s neighbour, Norway, as usual can’t take a hint. (:

Patriotism*** in the States on the other hand, is big. As previously mentioned in my last post, Americans aren’t weighed down by any social conduct, it is okay to brag and be proud. According to my understanding, the US is somewhat built on this way of thinking. From the start, it was a free country where you could believe in whatever you wanted, and be proud of it. I will dig deeper into this topic in a later post. Anyway, now that I’ve explained a little about the nationalism & patriotism in the countries, we can move on to how they actually celebrate.

Most of you have probably heard about the 4th of July in the US. Celebrations are massive. There are parades, fireworks, food, music and A LOT of American flags EVERYWHERE. Now, I’ve never actually properly celebrated the 4th of July while in the US, so I can’t speak from my own experiences, this is all based on what people have told me. However, I have been in Sweden during the national day many times.

It’s a little funny, but June 6th, Sweden’s national day, was actually made a public holiday in 2005, with the hopes that more people would go out and celebrate. **** Needless to say, celebrating big isn’t a thing. There is a ceremony, broadcasted on TV, where the King and Queen take part. The flag is run up the mast and there are music performances by known artists. Some children dress up in traditional peasant costumes and for once there are a lot of flags being waved. Other than this, there isn’t that much going on. In my home city, Gothenburg, the Gothenburg symphony orchestra has a concert in our central park and a lot of people will go there and have picnics. Some bakeries will make pastries with Swedish flags in them. Lastly, there is one more important thing that Swedes do on the national day: there are special ceremonies welcoming new Swedish citizens to the country. Now you know a little bit more about the celebration of national days in Sweden and the US, hope you enjoyed.And remember, this is all based on my experiences, others may think differently about it.

-K

*https://swedesour.home.blog/2019/05/28/pridepretentiousness/

**https://www.thefreedictionary.com/nationalism

***https://www.thefreedictionary.com/patriotism

****https://sweden.se/culture-traditions/national-day/

Yesterday was Memorial Day in the US. For those of you who don’t know, Memorial Day is a national holiday in the US. It is meant to be a day to remember and honour America’s military, especially those who have given their lives in the line of duty. * This kind of holiday, honouring military, is a big cultural difference from Sweden. In America, patriotism (being proud of your country) is an obvious thing to most people (okay, recently the pride hasn’t been as strong due to certain political events…). It is socially accepted to be proud not only of your country, but of yourself, and it is okay to be so openly. This last part is what differs in Sweden. Of course you can be proud of your country and yourself, but you can NOT openly talk/brag about it. No Swede would ever for instance salute the Swedish flag, I mean, never.

So what is this strange social rule in Sweden, saying you can’t be openly proud? It’s called “Jantelagen” = “Law of Jante” – meaning, you are not better than anyone else.** This is NOT an actual law in Sweden, however, it is a social rule, carved into the hearts of the Swedish people. It is actually divided up into 10 (or 11 sometimes) rules, all about how you are not better than anyone else and how you shouldn’t feel too proud of yourself. Practically, this just means that Swedish people tend to not be show offs, because if they are, they may be a little bit hated. Basically it’s about being humble, not showing off but not showing self pity either. You have to be in between – “lagom”.

Americans don’t have these social rules to weigh them down (yes, I am a tiny bit critical to this “Jantelagen”). That’s why there can be holidays such as Memorial Day. Also, if an American is successful in any way, then can openly talk about it in public and not only tell their immediate family. Yes, sometimes Swedes don’t even brag to their extended family, since maybe a cousin or so will be hurt or jealous of the success. When I first came to Minnesota I went out to dinner with a couple of girls from work. One said to another: “So, did you get an A on your test?” the other one answered with a smile: “Of course I did”. After that we all congratulated her and went on eating as if nothing had happened. This would not be the case in Sweden. Usually people avoid talking about grades all together since it can be a touchy subject for those who don’t do as well. Also, if you were to get an A, you would never tell people openly. Only if they really asked to know, would you maybe, in a slightly embarrassed manner, tell then you scored the highest. Or you would lie and say you were the second best. Depends on how Swedish you are I guess… ha ha. (Being half American has its advantages.)

Now, just to be clear, as always people vary. There are humble Americans and Swedish show-offs. In this case I do think Swedish people often tend to follow the Law of Jante to a certain degree, but not always as extreme as above mentioned. This because it is such an ingrown part of Swedish culture. Same goes for Americans. I believe Americans are more keen on sharing their success because of the proud culture. Here, it is okay to be proud. It is even encouraged (for instance on Memorial Day). People are affected by the cultural environment that they grow up in.

-K

*https://www.newsweek.com/memorial-day-2019-facts-difference-veterans-day-1432927

** https://hejsweden.com/en/jantelagen-law-of-jante-how-to-be-swedish/

“Hustle  – to move or act energetically or rapidly” *. This is a word that I had never heard before I came to Minnesota. When I heard it, it was used in a sports context. All the players were hustling so they didn’t come off as lazy in front of the coaches. It basically means to hurry, to do something quickly. So, why am I talking about this word?

Today’s post is about the pace of life in Sweden vs the USA. In the US, you are always expected to hustle. This might seem odd especially to all my Swedes out there who have heard the stereotype that “all Americans are lazy” more than once in their life (sigh…). First of all, let’s clear this up – all Americans aren’t lazy. Some are, but not all. Just like in Sweden. Second of all, when I say that you are expected to always hustle in America, I don’t mean every single individual at all times. I mean, that the pace of life in America, is much faster than in Sweden. Americans always want everything fast. The work has to be done fast, the messages have to be delivered quickly, your coffee should be done within 2 min of when you order (this is actually a rule at my workplace), service should always be fast. Your are also expected to be present at the workplace way more in the US than in Sweden. A lot of offices require at least 6-8 h of “face time” every day, and working from home is sometimes frowned upon.  

So, everything is supposed to go quickly, you are supposed to do all of these million things in one day, you are supposed to hustle. This type of living is very time consuming. To be at work 9 h a day, to deliver what is expected in a short amount of time. In addition to these tasks, the country is BIG that it takes forever to physically get anywhere. In addition to your 8-9 h at the office, it often takes at least 30 min-1 h each way to even get there. This results in life being very high paced and in my opinion pretty stressful. I don’t mean that you are actively consciously stressed at all times, but subconsciously. The way of life becomes more hectic since you never have time to breath and take a break.

What about Sweden? Do all Swedes move in slow motion and sit around and do nothing? Of course not. Swedes go to work every day too. They also probably spend about 8-9 h a day at work. But, they take breaks. I don’t mean that they aren’t productive, but a 10 min coffee break in the morning won’t make a difference. In addition to this, the commute for Swedes are generally shorter than for Americans due to the shorter physical distances. Swedes simply don’t have to travel as far. Also, the general pace is more relaxed. Of course you are expected to deliver at work, what has to be done has to be done, but it is in a calmer manner in my experience. Swedes want their coffee quickly as well, but there’s no one stressing them with a 2 min rule. Where Americans only focus on the speed, Swedes focus on efficiency in a calm manner.

This is a topic that is a little difficult to explain, especially to people who have only lived in one of the two cultures. It’s not always concrete things that determine the pace of life, sometimes it is just the atmosphere and they way people act. My point is that life in Sweden vs the US feels different because of the way people are, their expectations and how they choose to fulfill them. In America speed is everything, whereas in Sweden it’s more about efficiency in a calmer manner.

-K

*https://www.thefreedictionary.com/hustle

Something I’ve wanted to talk about for a while now is how different families do dinner in everyday life. What I mean is not what kind of food they eat, but in what way the have dinner together. Is it always only one person making dinner? Or does the whole family help? Does the family sit together around a table and eat, or do they spread out? Do they even eat together?

In my house growing up, we almost always had dinner together. Most of the time one of the parents made dinner for everyone around six o’clock. We would either have the food sitting on the stove or on the table, and then eat together around the set kitchen table (plates, forks, knifes, glasses), discussing how our day had been, etc. Most of my friends’ families did the exact same thing. The only time family members would eat separately, is if there were special circumstances, for instance if someone worked late or had an activity.

Now, in my experience most Swedish families have similar situations to above. What about American families? As far as I have experienced, some people will do dinner in that kind of a way as well. However, a lot of American families I have talked to or heard about actually don’t. Someone, usually a parent, will make food, and then put a stack of plates next to the stove for everyone to come and take for themselves, and then go to sit wherever they please and eat. This can be around a table, but it can also be in your room or on the coach. The whole concept of sitting down, together, around a set table and talking to each other every single evening does not seem to be as common as in Sweden. Of course American families will have dinners like that on occasion, but not every night.

Anyway, I just wanted to clarify as usual that this is all based on my experience and what people tell me. It doesn’t mean it’s always the case. I even know of Swedes who don’t sit down for dinner like described, and Americans who do. Lastly there is one more detail I wanted to mention: eating with a fork and knife. When I was six years old, at school, I was forced to eat with both a fork and a knife. The teachers said that everyone had to eat “properly”. Now, I come to Minnesota, and A LOT of people only eat with a fork?! Why is this like this people? Even in restaurants, I will see complete families, all ages, eating with just forks. Even if it is meat or chicken. This is a cultural thing I just can’t understand, especially since it can be a little impractical? Like how do you cut with only a fork? (: Haha.

-K

Hi! Since the summer and warmth has reached Minnesota (finally!!) the whole place has magically been changed into a different, nice and pleasant place. Where you can actually be outside without dying of cold, wind, rain or snow. Wow, it’s like a whole new experience. *Note the passive aggression towards Minnesotan weather*. So, this means people are getting outside, having bbq:s (get-togethers where you grill food)  and lawn parties. Therefore, I thought I’d talk a little bit about the way people dress to these outdoor festivities.

Something I’ve noticed that differs a lot between the cultures, is the definition of “casual” and “classy”. Now, “casual”. What does that mean to you? Jeans and tank? Short skirts? Old washed out white t-shirts? Basketball shorts? Sweatpants? In America casual means basically anything (that covers you up of course, come on, we can’t get too liberal…right America?). You can show up as you are, in anything, to a bbq, yard party or family gathering. In Sweden, casual means casual – with certain rules. If you are going to be with people that aren’t your immediate family, you will try to keep it a little above casual. Meaning, the sweatpants are out. If it’s a bbq with your neighbours, it’s not a big deal to just come in shorts and a t-shirt, but if you are invited to a smaller lawn party, you might want to step it up, maybe a dress or a button-up shirt.

What about “classy”? If Swedes take “casual” that seriously, then what do they do with “classy”? Well, in Sweden, there are many levels of “classy” or a better word is probably “formal” (it didn’t fit into the title, okay. ). When we’re talking bbq:s and lawn parties, Swedes won’t go too far with the formal wear, but shorts (nicer material) + dress shirt, dress, skirt, maybe even nicer shoes, are all not unlikely. Usually you can tell there’s a lot of effort involved to look nicer and “cleaned up” so to speak. Americans, don’t do “formal” very well. Either it’s casual, or they’re dressed as if they were going to work in a suit and tie etc. This, business-like clothing, is not what Swedes are dressed as when they’re “formal”, it’s a different kind of formal. I realize this sounds very vague, the point I’m trying to make is that Americans don’t seem to dress formally when going to private activities, they only dress up for work, whereas Swedes in my experience, will sometimes dress more formally to private parties, than to work.

So anyway, now you know a little about the summer fashion of the two cultures. I have to admit, this is one of the more random topics I’ve had, but yet it’s a very noticeable cultural difference.

-K

So the other week I got to see an American prom for the very first time! (Besides in TV shows..) It was a really fun experience and it got me thinking of the differences between prom in the US and in Sweden. The concept exists in both countries and usually takes place during  high school. The dress code is pretty much the same but the events differ.

I’d like to start by saying that prom is generally a bigger deal in America than it is in Sweden. Now don’t get me wrong, it is a big deal for a lot of people in Sweden as well, the stress is definitely real. However, what I wanted to get to is that prom in America is a full day deal where you go to several different places for eating, taking pictures, being announced, the actual dance and “post prom”. In Sweden, prom usually starts around 5 in the afternoon and you usually stay in one place the entire time.

So, to some of the main differences. In the US, you go to prom with a prom date. You can go with a friend group if you want to, but it is not very common. Almost everyone goes in couples, a boy and a girl, and they all arrive in cars. It is common to try to borrow the nicest car in the family, to keep it classy you know… (: This is not a thing in Sweden. Not the cars, and most often not going as couples either. People can definitely go as couples – if they want to, usually if they have a significant other. But in my experience most people just go with their friends in a group.

Then there’s the announcing. When the American prom couples get out of their car, they are announced by someone with a microphone. A lot of parents are lined up to see the couples walk from their cars down a walkway for everyone to see. “Miss X escorted by Mr. Y”. In Sweden, a lot of parents don’t even come to the designated place for photographing, they usually take photos at home and then either drop the student off at the place of prom or have them get there on their own. This probably sounds a little cold to some of you Americans out there, but it’s really not. Swedish parents are as proud as you are. (Hopefully.. :D)

In Sweden, prom is taking photos, having a fancy dinner with some entertainment, and then proceeding to a club for the after party. Prom is usually not organized by the actual school, but by a prom committee, all students. In the US, prom is organized by the school, including the after party which they call “post prom”. Post prom is usually in a gymnasium all decorated, filled with games and activities. Usually the students go home in between prom and post prom, to get out of their dressy clothes and in to casual ones. Yet another thing that doesn’t happen in Sweden.

In my opinion a big difference between Sweden and the US is how much supervision the students are under. Generally in Sweden, high school students are free to do whatever they want. Since the drinking age is 18 in Sweden, it is not uncommon for the prom dinner to include wine. And as previously said, Swedish prom turns into a club later in the evening. In the US, students first of all tend to be younger when they go to prom for the first time, maybe 16-17, and since the drinking age is 21, most students are underaged. Also, high school students in the US tend to have much less freedom, resulting in prom being in a controlled environment, even post prom, and parents knowing where they are and what they are doing at all times. Especially since everyone drives to prom in the US, there is extra supervision during the post prom, all car keys are kept during the hours there, since we don’t want any drunk driving….but there is no alcohol there, so it shouldn’t be a problem right…?

-K

The time has come for me to try to tackle this extremely important and charged subject. The environment and sustainability. Swedes, I know what you’re thinking, “HAHA the USA is going to take a hit on this one”. And yes, this is partly true since it is commonly known that the US contributes a lot to our planet getting destroyed. However, firstly I want to talk a little about the reasons behind the two countries’ views of the state of the environment and sustainability.

So, for those of you who don’t know the general thoughts and stereotypes about the two countries, let me give you a short summary: Sweden: tries really hard to save our planet, uses a lot of public transport, fanatically recycles and lessens the taxes for those who drive “green” cars. The USA: Does not try very hard to save our planet, drives cars everywhere possible, does not recycle a lot and does not focus on rewarding environmentally friendly thinking/actions. Remember, these things are stereotypes, doesn’t mean they are generally true. However, in my opinion there is sadly a lot of truth to them, at least in my experience.  

Rebuilding infrastructure is not the easiest thing. In order to increase the amount of public transportation for instance, it would take a lot of money and effort. The second part, effort, is something I’ve noticed is very lacking among the Americans I’ve met. Either they don’t know about environmental issues and how to make them better, or they don’t have the resources to do so. I mean, everyone has to get around, to work, to school etc, in order to live their everyday life. My suggestion to making people aware of global issues is usually education. If they don’t know something, teach em! What I mean is, I went through school having to learn about the environment and sustainability, it was simply part of our learning material. Some people in the US have told me, that they never talked about these subjects in school at all. If the knowledge isn’t there, how can we expect the effort to be?

So, why is the situation like this? Let’s start by looking at the size of the countries. The US is VERY large, and Sweden is not. There is physically longer distances to travel in the US, regardless if it’s to work, to the grocery store or across the country. This results in it being harder to get places than in Sweden, hence the cars. In Sweden, everything is situated closer together. Often you are able to walk, bike or ride the bus places. So, just because of physical space, it is more difficult to be environmentally friendly in the US. Now all my Swedes out there are thinking, well, fix it?

Anyway, I know I’m sounding very negative towards the US and Americans right now, in my opinion with good reason, but I also want to point out, that Swedes are not so perfect either. Swedes fly five times the amount of the global average and the amount of flying has increased by 47% since 1990.* So even though Swedes are good about their sustainability at home, they still do their part in the destruction of our planet. I mean, who am I to talk, I fly back and forth between Sweden and the USA all the time now…

-K

*https://www.svt.se/nyheter/lokalt/stockholm/svenskarna-flyger-fem-ganger-mer-an-globala-genomsnittet   

So yesterday was ”Valborgsmässoafton” in Sweden. In English it translates to ”Walpurgis Eve” . This is a Swedish holiday the 30th of April every year, which is celebrated with music, parades, bonfires and parties. So what is Walpurgis Eve and why do Swedes celebrate it?

Walpurgis Eve is a day to welcome the return of Spring. The holiday originates from the Middle Ages and was actually the end of the administrative year. It was also during this day that annual village meetings were held. In addition, farm animals were let outside to graze. Ever since the early 1700s, fires were lit in order to scare away any predators that might want to eat the farm animals for dinner… and we’re not only talking animals, no, witches flying on brooms were equally feared. Anyway, this is where the tradition of the Bonfires comes from.

So, in addition to lighting fires, Spring songs are sung by choirs, people gather in parks and on the streets for parades and there is a fair amount of partying going on. Especially since the following day, May 1, is a national holiday in Sweden. Walpurgis Eve is also a sign for students that the end is coming, Summer is close. Usually there isn’t much left of the semester and you start to get the feeling of Summer.

Before I end this post, I also want to talk about the national holiday on May 1st. It is actually the traditional workers’ day, and therefore some political parties choose to demonstrate on this day every year. So for some, this is an extra, much needed, day off to get over your hangover, and for some this is a day where you have a chance to get your voice heard politically. Lastly I just want to say I got all my information from this website: https://sweden.se/culture-traditions/valborg-%e2%88%92-and-1-may/ so if you are interested, go have a look!

-K